As a communication professor, I faced an increasingly multicultural student population.
I enjoyed studying students’ cultures, including their communication.
But I hit a serious cross-cultural roadblock that challenged my effectiveness, particularly with Asians.
Asians were reluctant to meet with me about academic problems until they were in fairly deep trouble. They almost never came to my office hours. No matter how kindly I invited them before or after class to see me, they rarely came. What could I do?
Based on my cross-cultural research, I assumed that my Asian students probably had a sense of shame when talking with me about their apparent academic “failures.” Some Asian colleagues confirmed my tentative explanation. They semi-joked that I should spend time in an Asian culture if I really wanted to learn how to teach Asians. It made sense.
Instead, I decided to try embracing my Midwestern-ness and students’ high-tech practices.
I had always found office hours a bit contrived and intimidating when I was a student. It seemed like going to the hospital during clinic hours. There had to be a better, more hospitable way of connecting with students regularly.
I started firing off daily text messages to students, alerting them to when I would be “hanging out” in the campus café. I said I would love to buy them coffee and chat if they they were in the area. In effect, I used the informal method they all use to connect in person.*
I brought along work, not really expecting many students to join me. I was wrong.
Students started coming to coffee individually and in gaggles. We talked about my lectures, their academic projects, and even the required readings.
If a student brought up a sensitive academic issue, I suggested for privacy that the two of us move to a nearby empty classroom.
Asians frequently joined my coffee klatches. They said that they were honored by my invitations. Honored? By creatively embracing my Midwestern openness and their texting practices, I was turning shame into honor.
A common assumption in cross-cultural communication studies is that we need to understand “other” cultures. True.
But we can also adapt our own cultural practices, making them fitting for others.
Midwestern hospitality takes many forms, from washing dishes together (at least pots and pans) to at-home “suppers” and church potluck brunches.
Going “out for coffee” is now a widespread Midwestern practice meant to facilitate open, informal conversation.
I embraced my Midwestern ways in order to connect with students from other cultures.
I used students’ own technological practice—connecting on the fly through texting—to signal my Midwestern availability in their vernacular (hanging out).
We sometimes fail as cross-cultural communicators because we seek only to understand other cultures. I believe that we can’t fully embrace others’ “differences” unless we also leverage our own.
—Dr. Q
*I ask students to fill out “contact info” surveys before classes even begin so I know how they would like me to communicate with them. They nearly all prefer text messaging over email.