Why We Should Write More Handwritten Thank-You Notes Today—and the 2 Things to Avoid

 I went to a local printer to order 500 personalized note cards with envelopes.

“Aren’t you on email?” the owner asked me.

“Sure,” I replied. “That’s why I’m ordering the cards. They mean more now than ever.”

He seemed puzzled.

In the age of digital media, handwritten notes are gaining importance. Especially genuine thank-you notes.

Beware of two problems.

First, the the note has to avoid flattery.

Flattery—excessive or insincere praise—corrupts expressions of gratitude.

Recipients can smell inauthentic praise a mile away. We need to keep the level of expressed gratitude in tune with what the person actually did.

“Thank you for the best job interview I have ever had!” Really? You must not have secured many.

“Your party was the highlight of my year.” Huh? You must live a boring life.

Second, a note needs to be neatly written.

I am a college professor. I know from essay exams that students don’t do much cursive writing. Some use block letters.

We all own our own handwriting—for good and for bad. If yours is shaky, get some lined paper and practice.

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I am an impatient writer, so my cursive suffers if I don’t slow down. My daughter calls my everyday cursive “chicken scratch.”

When I write a note, I put lined paper underneath so I can keep my words lined up.

The only kind of thank-you note worse than an emoticon-laden text message or an impersonal email is  one written in sloppy cursive. Sloppy note—sloppy you; not a good message.

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If you can’t clean up your cursive, print out a note on a note card and sign it in the best cursive you can manage. It’s still much better than text and email.

Write your notes well, from the heart. Avoid flattery. Be neat.

Thankfully yours,

—Dr. Q